Out of the Closet, Into the Dressing Room Thursday, Jul 10 2008

Let me just say that, yes, I am indeed an obviously gay guy. I listen to Britney, Christina, Madonna, and I sing aloud to their music. Hell, I’ll even dance down the sidewalk sometimes (I mean, it’s Fergie, guys; give me a break). I love to wear cowboy style plaid shirts in pastel colors. And pink. Which, according to my friend’s mom, is a girl’s color. And I’ve read Wilde and Kramer and Mishima. And Holleran and Hollinghurst, but I didn’t really like them. So I’ll concede that I fit into a bundle of stereotypes regarding musical, sartorial, and literary taste. I don’t adhere to all gay stereotypes though, but even if I did, does that mean I’m any less legitimate of a person?

I’ve been applying for jobs today, and most of the places I applied have been rather shocked to see me. My outfit, as with most of my outfits, is a melange of soft pastels, with a (t-shirt covered) pair of small pecs unintentionally popping out of the buttoned front. I mean, the shirt is kind of small. Coupled with dark wash jeans, I figured this could basically be an outfit to cover any standards of trendiness for any venues I may enter in the search for a new job. In the used clothing store I tried first, I didn’t get a second glance from a single person there. But in all seven (seven!) other places that I visited, I received the strangest looks, all ostensibly stemming from my choice in ensemble. I was even turned away from one place immediately after asking the manager if they were hiring.

Granted, perhaps I’m reading too much into the responses of these people. Maybe I’m just being too sensitive. But I definitely received the up-and-down look from a few managers and employees. So did I receive different treatment for having a relatively gay-associated sense of style? I think so. But what happened to marketable homosexuality? I mean, the commodification of the gay male in the retail outlet used to be a valuable asset to any vendor. Now? Not so much.

So while I am disappointed that I was evaluated based on my clothing, I must say that I am pleasantly surprised that I wasn’t carried straight into the retail workplace based solely on the fact that I’m a gay man. I’m not Carson, and I don’t need to be in order to become a valuable employee. Thoughts? Experiences? Put ‘em here.

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When will you end this, Tila? Thursday, Jul 3 2008

So after a brief hiatus, let’s jump right back into pop culture with perhaps the most recent happening in the LGBTQ world, Tila Tequila’s recent finale on A Shot at Love II. Now, in case you were wondering what this is, Tila is a former model turned singer whose myspace was the most popular of all musical artists as of a couple of years ago. Now she spends her time on the aforementioned reality show, searching for love among 16 males and 16 females. That’s right, ladies and gentlemen, Tila is bi.

Now, you’d think that having a bisexual figure in the media would be a good thing, right? Well, Tila’s about to spit all over the bisexual dream of understanding and acceptance. Why’s that? Because Tila has set out to reaffirm the slut-bisexual stereotype that is oh-so-lamentably-prevalent in society today. I’ll admit, when I first emerged from my conservative cocoon three years ago, and went through the first stages of self-loathing gayness, I was one of the ones who thought that bisexuality was simply an excuse to be a slut. As did my then-boyfriend. As did many of my then-friends. A semester later, after a kick in the head with some actual common sense, I came to realize that, SHOCKER, bi people are just that: People. No different from you and me. And that slut-bisexual mindset? Completely mistaken.

But what does this have to do with our little Tila? The sole representative of bisexuality in popular media today (I mean, besides Anne Heche, whom everyone deems a kook) chooses to cavort around, throwing herself not only onto every contestant, but also onto their family members. And even though I’m all about a woman’s sexual liberation, I feel that a good deal of Tila’s gratuitous semi-nudity is meant to appeal to the male audience, thus furthering the problems surrounding the male gaze, rather than for the actual pursuit of Tila’s ideal romantic partner. As we all know, Kristy’s most famous line is perhaps when she says that every guy’s fantasy is to see Tila and her with each other. Oh, and if it’s not, then you’re gay. Way to objectify yourself, Kristy.

Honestly, if this show is supposed to be about Tila’s finding love, then she should consider ending the catering to horny male audiences, cutting the gratuitous girl-on-girl action, and showing more clips of how she’s becoming emotionally involved with each person. I mean, she gives evaluations of the contestants every five seconds in the episode where she visits families, but prior to that, all that I was aware of, due to the editing of the show, was that Bo broke his jaw and that Kristy has a nice badonka.

So please, Tila, stop giving the male masses what they want, and just try to find love! Real love! Without compromising the already negative representation of bisexuals everywhere.

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